Sewing for the Soul, by Kim (@sewmuchtosay)
TW : discussions of chronic illness, symptoms and mental health.
This dress is a reminder for me, a reminder that inside I am still me, the mad spontaneous me that has crazy ideas and mostly follows them until the end. For me, the outcome is just as important as the process of an idea put into action .
The reasons why I am writing about this particular dress :
2 years ago I had major surgery, I had just turned 47. I had been back and forth to the doctors with excruciating pain with my periods most of my life.
I had started my periods at 9 years old and they left me bed bound at times, with my bladder and bowel also affected. I had yearly colonoscopies, with them same results. ALL CLEAR.
I finally took myself off to a private clinic where I was diagnosed with adenomyosis and severe endometriosis. It was on my bowel wall, my bladder, my whole reproductive system was covered.
I had 10 cm of my bowel removed and a full hysterectomy and a bladder shave.
I am now in surgical menopause without HRT.
I have tried just 2 types of HRT, I am limited to what I can take as I need combined. There is also a risk of the endo flaring back up with HRT, TBH I am done with hormones.
It is tough at times, I do think the light at the end of the tunnel is appearing.
I sew for my soul, I create mad ideas at times — but I love the freedom. I enter my little wooden shed, go into a zone, the creative zone that takes away everything, I can only think about my task ahead, my soul gets rejuvenated.
At times I make lots of mistakes, I do not care, I am having fun, that’s what it is all about right ?
This dress is a reminder of myself, where I will wear it I do not know. You may see a pic of me in my local supermarket wearing it one day !
It makes me laugh as I put it on when we are just about to leave the house, just for my husband to say REALLY ! ARE YOU WEARING THAT!? My job is done !
This self draft, was inspired by Molly Goddard, I adore her designs.
I layered the netting to a band, in sections of 10 inches wide, added an underskirt, sewed to bodice, reduced bulk, added sleeves to the bodice.
I picked up the netting from our local haberdashery in their sale, I was so pleased to pic up 30 mrs for £10.00, little things that make me smile .
Menopause is good, bad and sometimes ugly.
The empowerment I get now from being in menopause is amazing, I am able to speak the truth without feeling guilty, ( in a nice manner of course) no more periods.
I finally have my life back, however it is different, I cannot lie, or I cannot deny, I do have bad days, however those bad days... I turn them into creative days, It's all about balance, recognising, and most importantly self love.
Everybody's journey is different, what we need to learn is not to compare ourselves to others, embrace the skills we have and learn more along the way.